The Hazelden Blog

Radio Health Journal, an award-winning weekly program distributed by MediaTracks, asks national addiction experts, “Do you tell your kids about your drug and alcohol experiences?”  Listen as Hazelden’s Marvin D. Seppala, M.D., chief medical officer, and Joseph Lee, M.D., child and adolescent psychiatrist and addiction specialist are joined by CASA Chairman Joseph A. Califano, Jr. and others, to address this issue and provide guidance. 

Download the podcast.

William Cope Moyers

William Moyers, Hazelden’s vice president of foundation relations, was interviewed by Robin Robins on ABC’s Good Morning America recently where he viewed the highly publicized plight of actor Charlie Sheen with the same compassion afforded to all alcoholics and addicts who struggle to maintain sober lives.  “Good for Charlie if, in fact, it is a preventive measure,” said Moyers.  “A lot of people struggle at times to stay on top of their addiction.”
 
Watch the Good Morning America interview now courtesy of ABC.

Beverly Conyers, author of Addict in the Family, explains how crisis presents loved ones of addicts and alcoholics with an opportunity for personal growth.

Someday far down the road, when the pain of facing addiction is not so raw and when we have begun our journey toward recovery and healing, we may come to regard the addiction of our loved one as a turning point that led us to embrace life on a deeper level. Every crisis presents an opportunity for personal growth, and facing the addiction of a loved one can help us to become stronger, more tolerant, and less judgmental.

As Jack expressed it, “I would never say I’m glad my son became addicted. But I’m thankful that as a result of his addiction, I’ve become a better person. There was a time when I might have looked at others who were having family problems and thought, ‘Oh, what are you doing wrong? You must have done something to cause this.’ Now I’m more compassionate. I know that terrible trouble can come to anyone.”

Deb said, “I used to be very judgmental. I couldn’t understand why people didn’t just do things my way. Then everything would be all right. Now I believe that everyone is doing the best they can. You can’t expect more than that.”

Hope said, “Because addiction came into my life, I’ve become a little more accepting of other people, a little more understanding of what other people are feeling. It’s also helped me put things in perspective. I don’t have a lot of tolerance for the ‘poor me’ syndrome anymore. Instead of dwelling on what’s not here, I keep a gratitude list. Sometimes it’s an exercise to say, ‘I trust you, God.’  But I have faith. I have some peace. This is life.”

What Jack, Deb, Hope, and many others have learned is that addiction is a devastating experience both for addicted individuals and for those who love them. Few things in life are more painful than watching substance abuse steal our loved ones away from us. But addiction is also an experience from which addicts and their families can emerge stronger and wiser than they were before. Many recovering addicts, including my own daughter, become people of great compassion, humility, and generosity. Many recovering families of addicts develop similar strengths of character.

Addiction, like cancer, is not a disease that can be cured. There is never a point in time when we can say it is all over; the battle has been won. But it is a disease from which important lessons can be learned. If from among those lessons we learn how to live our own lives to the best of our ability and acquire the grace to allow others to do the same, then something immeasurably precious will have been won.

Excerpted from Addict in the Family by Beverly Conyers, M.A. Conyers is an editor and freelance writer who lives in New England. She is also the author of Everything Changes: Help for Families of Newly Recovering Addicts.